Sunday, April 6, 2014

Dementia with Dignity: I Hope You Dance

Dementia with Dignity: I Hope You Dance: Dave was younger than most of our other residents. He had been found wandering and very confused. After a brief hospital stay, he came to ...

I Hope You Dance

Dave was younger than most of our other residents. He had been found wandering and very confused. After a brief hospital stay, he came to live with us.  Many of the staff were frightened by him because he could become very angry when upset. I think his anger came from his lack of control after being placed in a long term care facility for his own safety. He was a very active gentleman who liked to be in charge. He also had been a career Army man and was used to being in control of a situation. One of the first things I learned about Dave was that he was a gentleman. He knew how to show respect, but you had to earn it. He often used rather salty language, but I would just gently remind him that I was lady and I knew he didn't talk to ladies like that. I think that gentle reminder helped him to gain control of his emotions, and he would always apologize with sincerity.

Dave loved music and dancing. Almost every day after lunch, we would turn on the music and share a dance together. He was an excellent dancer, much better than I was with my two left feet. He never once complained as I stumbled through our dance. He smiled and would often sing along with the music. He stood taller as we were transported to another time with the music. I could see the man he used to be...the man he still was when dementia let him. Music was the only activity he ever seemed interested in. He shared his love of music and dancing with anyone who was willing to join him. I don't know whatever became of Dave after he left our facility; but Dave,
if you are out there somewhere...I hope you dance!